Wednesday, October 5, 2011

I Need A Raise

Employee:    Excuse me sir, may I talk to you?
  Boss:            Sure, come on in.  What can I do for you?

 Employee:    Well sir, as you know, I have been an employee of this
 prestigious firm for over ten years.
 Boss:            Yes.

 Employee:    I won't beat around the bush.  Sir, I would like a raise. I
 currently have four companies after me and so I decided to talk to you first.
 Boss:   A raise?  I would love to give you a raise, but this is just not the right time.

 Employee: I understand your position, and I know that the current economic down turn
    has had a negative impact on sales, but you must also take into consideration my
    hard work, pro- activeness and loyalty to this company for over a decade.
 Boss:   Taking into account these factors, and considering I don't want to start a brain drain,
    I'm willing to offer you a ten percent raise and an extra five days of vacation time.
     How does that sound?

 Employee:    Great!  It's a deal!  Thank you, sir!
 Boss:    Before you go, just out of curiosity, what companies were after you?

 Employee:    Oh, the Electric Company, Gas Company, Water Company and the
 Mortgage Company!

Monday, October 3, 2011

A Pharmacist Advice

A pharmacist told his new assistant to be polite to every customer that came in. "If you're stuck for conversation, talk about the weather," he advised.
 

When the pharmacist came back from having his dinner, the assistant was sporting a lovely black eye. "So much for your advice," moaned the assistant.
 

"What happened?" asked the pharmacist.
 

"Well, this woman came in for a packet of sanitary napkins. Trying to make conversation, I said that it looked like it was going
to be a dull weekend…" 

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