The Sheepherder and The Whore

A sheepherder made it in to San Antonio, Texas, after 10 years in the bush. He found a saloon and approached the bartender. He told the bartender "I need a woman."

The bartender said, "There are women all over San Antone for a price."

The sheepherder replied, "Just any woman won't do. I ain't fucked nuthin' but goats 'n sheep for the last ten years. They got cockle burrs 'n mesquite thorns around their pussy and my old dick is tough with calluses on it, and I need a good tough piece of ass."

So the bartender tells him, "Well, you're in luck. The toughest broad in all San Antonio has a room right up stairs." The bartender picks up the phone, contacts the lady, explains the situation, and tells the sheepherder to go on up.

The sheepherder gets a small ice bucket with two Lone Star long necks (the favorite brew in San Atone), and proceeds up the stairs. When he gets to the room he says, "The barkeep told me you are the toughest broad in town."

The lady is livid, and says, "Well he's a lyin' son of a bitch. I'm the toughest broad in Texas, and probably in the whole United States."

Excitedly, the sheep herder says, "Well, you're just what I'm looking for." He then turned and leaned over to set the bucket of beer on the coffee table.

Just then, the woman threw her skirt up around her waist and bent over and grabbed her ankles. Her brown eye was looking him right in the eyeball.

A bit surprised, the sheepherder says, "Damn, baby. I know you're tough, but I don't wanna do ya that way."

To which the wench replies, "Who said any thing about that? I thought you wanted to open your damn beers."